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You’re a great listener.



     Welcome
to this chapter. You’re doing a great job. So far, you’ve learned two terrific
Yes Bank strategies. They are the “Be Charming” and the “Team
Player” strategies. You can use them every chance you get. They will help
the Yes Bank grow. Before you know it, it’ll be super gigantic.


     Here’s
the third strategy. Let’s call it the “Great Listener” strategy. This
strategy is special. It’s about important conversations. The four steps are
really interesting. When you use them, people will be amazed. They will wonder
how you do it. They will want to tell you “yes” every chance they
get. It works like this.


     You’re
the Yes Bank boss and have a gigantic Yes Bank. How do you do it? You use your
“Great Listener” Strategy.


     When
people are talking, you let them know you’re listening. How do you do that? You
hold still and pay attention. When it’s your turn to talk, you talk quietly.
You also talk slowly and stay calm. That lets people know you’re really paying
attention. They can tell that you’re listening and that you’re interested.


     Does this
sound like a strategy you can use? If so, here’s some more stuff about it.


     1. Hold
still and pay attention. It can be really hard to sit still, stand still, or be
still. Those aren’t easy things to do. Sometimes, being the Yes Bank boss is
hard work. Holding still is one of the hardest parts.


     There’s a
special secret about this holding still stuff. You only have to do it when
someone is talking. If no one is talking, it’s okay to wiggle and squirm around
a little.


     Well,
okay. You have to hold still when you get your hair cut. I forgot about that.
Thanks for reminding me.


     Let’s see
if I get it right this time. Most of the time, you can wiggle and squirm a
little unless someone is talking. Did I get it right that time?


     If you
want to stop for a minute right now to wiggle and squirm a little, that’s okay.
Go ahead. Get in a spectacular wiggle and a couple of totally terrific squirms.
When you’re ready, we’ll get back to it.


     When you
hold still and pay attention, people can tell you’re listening. Here’s the
secret part. They are more likely to tell you “Yes” if you hold still
and pay attention.


     2. Talk
quietly. You know the first step in this strategy. You hold still and pay
attention when someone is talking. If you hold still, it’ll be easier to talk
quietly when it’s your turn to talk.


     Is that a
little weird? Talking quietly is easier if you hold still. You’re right. It’s a
little weird.


     Try this.
Hold very still. Now try to talk very quietly. Don’t whisper. Talk very
quietly. It’s really easy, isn’t it? Sure it is. It’s also very easy for
someone to understand you.


     Now try
this. Start jumping up and down and wiggling around. While you’re doing that,
talk very quietly. Don’t whisper. Talk very quietly.


     Are you
surprised? It’s harder to talk quietly when you’re wiggling, isn’t it? It’s
also harder for someone to understand what you’re saying.


     Okay, you
get the idea. Hold still and talk quietly. People are more likely to tell you
“Yes” when you do. It helps the Yes Bank grow.


     3. Talk
slowly. This works like talking more quietly. You probably aren’t surprised
this time. If you hold still and talk quietly, it’s easier to talk slowly when
it’s your turn to talk.


     This is
what you need to know. People can get the wrong idea.


     If you
don’t hold still, they think you aren’t paying attention.


     If you
don’t talk quietly, they think you aren’t paying attention.


     If you
don’t talk slowly, they think you aren’t paying attention.


     I know.
That’s pretty weird too. It’s the way people are. If you wiggle and squirm,
talk loudly, and talk too fast, they think you aren’t paying attention.


     Here’s
the big problem. When people think you aren’t paying attention, the Yes Bank
gets smaller. You don’t want that, do you? You sure don’t.


     If you
hold still, talk quietly, and talk slowly, people know you’re paying attention.
When that happens, you make deposits to the Yes Bank. That’s why the Yes Bank
is gigantic.


     4. Stay
calm. Why do you think “Stay calm” is the last step in this strategy?


     You’ve
probably already figured this one out by yourself. What happens if you hold
still, talk quietly, and talk slowly?


     You’re
right. You’re staying calm.


     If you’re
excited or upset, you want to calm down. A good way to do that is to hold
still, talk quietly, and talk slowly. It won’t take very long. You can calm
down and stay calm.


     When you
stay calm with people, you make deposits in the Yes Bank. When you use all four
steps in the “Great Listener” strategy, what happens? People want to
tell you “Yes.” You are more likely to get “Yes” answers.


     Here are
the four steps in the “Great Listener” strategy.


     !    Hold still and pay attention.


     !    Talk quietly.


     !    Talk slowly.


     !    Stay calm.


     This is
spectacular. You now have three totally terrific Yes Bank strategies. You can
use them every chance you get.


     Congratulations.
Your Yes Bank is gigantic. It may be the world’s most gigantic Yes Bank.


     Before we
stop, I have a little quiz for you. It won’t take very long.


     Read the
questions in the quiz. After you read each question, stop and think about it.
Is the answer “Yes” or “No?”


!    Do you treat people the way
you want to be treated?


!    Are you consistent?


!    Are you friendly?


!    Are you interested in people?


!    Do you take your good manners
along everywhere you go?


!    Are you helpful and
cooperative?


!    Do you take care of your
responsibilities?


!    Do you do what you agree to
do?


!    Do you do things on time and
make sure you’re ready on time?


!    Do you hold still and pay
attention when people are talking?


!    Do you talk quietly when
you’re having an important conversation?


!    Do you talk slowly when
you’re having an important conversation?


!    Do you stay calm when you’re
having an important conversation?


     Here’s
the most important secret of all. You’re the Yes Bank boss today. That’s
definitely true.


     You’ll
also be the Yes Bank boss forever. This is why.


     You use
your Yes Bank strategies every chance you get. You keep getting better at each
strategy.


     You know
how to “Be Charming” and are getting better at it every day.


     You know
how to be a “Team Player” and are getting better at it every day.


     You know
how to be a “Great Listener” and are getting better at it every day.


     What do
you think? Are you amazing? You certainly are. That’s why you’re the Yes Bank
boss.


     Thank you
for reading this book. I enjoyed writing it for you. I’m very happy we’ve had
this time together. It’s great, spectacular, and totally terrific.


     Do you
want to say it one more time before we quit? Sure. Go ahead. “I’m
soooo….”





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Please send comments or questions to Gary A. Crow, Ph.D. GAC@drgarycrow.com || and visit www.drgarycrow.com.